My entire life I have never been a drug user…I do smoke pot but I have never popped pills or done any hard drugs….when I got sick 4 years ago the doctors started giving me different cocktails….

Xanax clodipin Volume adivan adderall…wtf! It’s to the point where my husband holds my meds and every morning when I get up I have a pill bottle and he puts the correct amount and dosage for the day….

How did this happen to me? I can’t believe I am even in a situation like this….I need to have control over myself…doing it the way we are I never run out of meds and I feel ok through out the day…..

Give me the meds back and I will run out and then be sick until my next doctor appointment…..I feel like a drug addict but if I don’t take the meds I can’t function at all….who do I blame? The shrink who dishes them out or myself for indulging?

If someone told me 5 years ago something like this would happen I would tell them they where crazy!

I feel like I am stuck! I am like a baby….can’t control my own actions…..I am smart enough to know to hand them over or in 2 weeks it will be a disaster…..

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